Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
