I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize