Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
