this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize