Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
