i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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