She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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