I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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