Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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