and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
