your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
