I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Randomize
