Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
