idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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