john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
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