every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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