so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
