ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
