Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
