rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
That reminds me...we need to get swords
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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