he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
