He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize