i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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