I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
