I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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