Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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