You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
