ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
