Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize