so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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