I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Screwed.edu
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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