Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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