so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
