Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
