Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
