Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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