im having a threesome with these popsicles
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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