you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize