Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
