i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
