Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize