If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I smell like Dick and happiness
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
