In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
