dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Randomize
