At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
