To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
