Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
