whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
