Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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