tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Welp...herpes.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
she smelled like a LAN party
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize